When one of your divorced parents announced they're getting remarried, you were extremely happy for them. But when your mom or dad asked you to participate in the wedding, you paused. Would you prefer having a role in the bridal party or would you rather be an observer? Here are some things to think about while you're trying to decide.
Second wedding ceremonies can showcase the new blended family.
Whether her daughter and his son are the maid of honor and best man, or his dad walks the bride down the aisle, it's always touching to witness a joining of two families. Walk down the aisle, post-ceremony, after the bride and groom as a group with all the children and grandchildren in tow and there won't be a dry eye in the house.
An individual gesture might feel more comfortable.
If doing something with a member of the other family would feel too chummy and unnatural, you could do a solo act, like a delivering a ceremony reading that you chose especially with your parent in mind or even officiate the wedding if designated properly.
You're not feeling warm and fuzzy.
If you don't particularly like your parent's spouse-to-be, participating in the wedding might be difficult. While you don't want to upset anyone, you want to be true to yourself. We understand but still believe you should show respect for your mom or dad by not badmouthing other siblings who do want to get involved.
No one should guilt you into your decision.
It's no shock that family members think they've got a right to tell other family members what to do. No such right—legal or otherwise—exists. Whether they think you should or should not take on a role in the wedding, you need to make up your own mind.