When it comes time to create the guest list for your wedding, you'll inevitably have to make some tough choices. Obviously, you'll put your dearest family members and longtime friends on the list, and you'll probably include a few work pals, too. Then your mom asks if you're inviting your boss. The boss? You weren't planning to, but now you're wondering what the protocol is. Does everyone invite their boss to their wedding? Answer the questions below to find out the right answer for your situation.
Are you friendly beyond office hours?
If you get a cocktail with her after work now and then but mostly talk business, you're probably not that close, so don't feel obligated to invite her. But if you regularly stop by her office to chat about your personal life, and she reciprocates, or you've filled her in on every wedding detail, it sounds like you're in the friend zone and should add her to the guest list.
Do you worry that she'll make your work life miserable if she's left off the list?
Don't invite anyone who intimidates you, even if you can see a future of boring assignments and thankless projects landing on your desk due to her absence on the guest list. It's your wedding and you should be surrounded by the people you care about—and who care about you. But take a moment to think about this: Is it possible you're overthinking it—will she really care that much if she's not invited and take it out on you?
Are you inviting everyone from work but her?
Don't think of her as just the boss—also think of her as a person with feelings. If she finds out you invited the whole gang except for her, she may be hurt, especially if the work atmosphere is social, the office is small, and she's a pleasant person. In that case, you should invite her.
Is she genuinely interested in you?
Some bosses take a personal interest in their workers' lives outside the office. Yours remembers your birthday and knows you're a big Red Sox fan; when you come to work sick, she insists you take the rest of the day off. Put this gem on your guest list.