Here's What You Need to Know About Your Role as a "Groomswoman"

Tips and tricks for the female member of a groom's wedding party.

groom bridesmaids blue
Photo: Audrey Hall & Melanie Maganias Nashan

Do you maintain many coed friendships? Then you might find yourself face-to-face with your male buddy as he's nervously asking you to serve as a "groomswoman" in his wedding. Naturally, you're ecstatic to stand by your friend or relative as he's tying the knot, but given the nontraditional nature of your new role, you might wonder about some of the logistics and details. Here's all you need to know about a being groomswoman.

Attire

Just like with bridesmaids or groomsmen, some couples may dictate your outfit choice as a groomswoman. They may ask you to wear a tuxedo, suit, or traditional gown that coordinates with the rest of the group's outfits. Other couples, however, will give you more freedom over your wedding-day ensemble. Since it's vital to "fit in" with other members of the bridal party, consider wearing a dress that matches the groomsmen's suits or ties. You can also wear something that resembles the bridesmaids' dresses, but you should avoid donning the exact same gown unless the couple explicitly asks you to.

Pre-Wedding Events

Although bachelor parties seem "manly," the groom will probably invite you to his pre-wedding bash. Some couples with coed wedding parties may also host a joint bachelor/bachelorette party with a gender-neutral focus. Always support the groom by attending these events, and simply don't participate in anything that makes you uncomfortable. Bonding with the boys will make the whole experience more rewarding for both parties!

Getting Ready

Some groomswomen may rightfully wonder if they're expected to get ready with the other groomsmen. This depends on the couple's wishes; some grooms prefer all members of his wedding party in one place, while others will suggest you get ready with the bridesmaids. If you're uncomfortable with either option, ask to get ready alone, then join the men shortly before the ceremony. You certainly don't want to miss the pre-wedding bonding!

Duties

During the wedding, you'll have the same duties as the other groomsmen, like taking pictures, walking down the aisle, and standing at the altar (on the same side as the rest of the groomsmen). Make sure to discuss the processional and recessional before the ceremony-does the couple want you to walk alone, to escort a bridesmaid, or to enter with one of the groomsmen? Also, if you're serving as the "best woman," you'll need to give a speech at the reception.

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