How to Handle Every Argument Based on Your Partner's Zodiac Sign

Use astrology to your advantage.

hybrid star map seating chart
Photo: Kate Sears

Even in the happiest, healthiest relationships, arguments are a normal part of sharing your life with another person. As the years go on, you'll probably learn how to deal with your significant other's nuances. But another way to better understand that person you're vowed to? Getting familiar with their star sign. We asked astrologer Kim Tigar, who has been studying the celestial bodies for 40 years, to give her best recommendation for handling an argument based on what day your partner was born. Here's what she suggests for each sign.

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If you're married to an Aries...

As a fire sign, you'll definitely find a passionate attitude in your Aries spouse. But with all that heat comes a quick temper, according to Tigar. The smallest thing might set them off, but the good news is that they'll probably let the anger go just as fast as it came. To help make those disagreements less intense, Tigar suggests approaching topics and conversations gently. "They like to be in charge, so you should let them lead the conversation. If you try to take it over, they'll get more upset," she explains. Instead? Let them have their peace and then calmly explain what's bothering you.

If you're married to a Taurus...

There's a reason the bull is depicted as the character for the Taurus. Though strong, dependable, and loyal, Tigar says this Earth sign can also be intolerably stubborn. Most of the time when facing a disagreement, Tigar says they're likely to shut down and refuse to talk about it. The key to getting them to have a productive conversation-instead of being silent-is all in the tone of your voice, according to Tigar. "You need to be calm and encourage them to talk about what's bothering them. Keep your voice low and try something like, 'We need to talk about this. However much you're willing to share, I'm here to listen when you're ready,'" she suggests.

If you're married to a Gemini...

You better enjoy a side of chit-chat with every meal, trip, or morning if you're married to a Gemini. This air sign is ruled by communication, making it one of the most important qualities they seek in a partner. That being said, when they're in the middle of a disagreement, you better wish yourself luck if you want to get out of it. "They will try and talk you out of an argument-and they won't give up. They'll just keep escalating it to prove a point," Tigar says. She adds that it's better to stop trying to be "right" and let them talk it out until they're finished. Then, you can say that you need time and space to think about it.

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If you're married to a Cancer...

Tread lightly-and carefully-when you're arguing with your water sign lover. Though very creative and home-oriented, a cancer's kind heart can be their downfall, too, making them highly sensitive. "During an argument, they might clam up or they will get really emotional and have an outburst," Tigar says. "You need to not push them, and if you feel like you are, back off. If you don't, you'll hurt their feelings very deeply and quickly." Once you've gotten as far as you can in the fight, Tigar says to suggest taking a moment to hug it out and remind your partner how much you care about them.

If you're married to a Leo...

What you'll love about being married to a Leo? They light up the whole room and still make you feel like the star of the show. Loving and generous, marrying your Leo love will feel like an adventure, but you'll want to make sure to not stomp too deeply on their egos. As Tigar says, "You're going to be wrong, no matter what you say because they are right and you are wrong-that's just how Leos see it." This is why you want to choose your words carefully during a fight. Tigar suggests the "compliment sandwich" technique: "Appeal to their ego by addressing your concerns, paired with a compliment to keep the disagreement civil."

If you're married to a Virgo...

There are a lot of things you probably won't have to worry about when you're married to this super-organized, detail-oriented, type-A earth sign. They'll always have financial planning top of mind, will want your home to run like a tight ship, and they'll never forget one thing you say. "A Virgo will analyze every little word that you say, and then they'll want to talk about every word and go over it until you're both exhausted," Tigar says. That's why the trick to arguing with a Virgo is to not give them too much information upfront or you'll be debating for hours. Instead, try making one solid point, keep your phrases brief, and remain centered while you chat. While a Virgo won't be too emotional, they're determined and won't throw in the towel.

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If you're married to a Libra...

At the heart of a Libra is, well, you. Since this air sign rules relationships, everything that happens in your marital union is their top priority. This is why you might notice your Libra spouse shut down if you express frustration or anger in their direction. And Tigar says that once you do get them to talk it out, it'll be very important to them that your disagreement is fair and balanced. "You have to fight clean with a Libra," she explains. "You should approach it softly and thoughtfully, while remembering to be loving and reassuring."

If you're married to a Scorpio...

While one of the boldest signs in the zodiac, it might surprise you to know that a Scorpio is actually a water sign. They are fiery in their personality but more intense and emotional at their core. When bringing up a touchy subject with your Scorpio partner, Tigar suggests setting up the scene for success. "You need them to be in a good mood and the right frame of mind when you want to talk about something. If not, they'll get overwhelmed and it'll be a knock-down, drag-out fight," she says. "Pick a peaceful place, like over a candlelit dinner at home with their favorite meal and wine."

If you're married to a Sagittarius...

Here's the thing about this fun-loving, freedom-seeking sign: They'll probably be mad at you several times throughout the day, but they'll forget about it. Tigar says the solution to fighting effectively with your spouse is focusing on their brighter qualities-like being happy-go-lucky and adventurous. "Go for a walk or get outside, so they're in their element and more open to discussion," Tigar says. "Just make don't fence them in during a fight, as this will make them irritated and angry."

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If you're married to a Capricorn...

If you let them, your Capricorn partner will walk all over you in a hot second. Because they're self-motivated, self-reliant, and often pretty intelligent, they're quick to get upset and then hold their ground. "Because they're used to being in charge, they will struggle when they feel like they're not right about something," Tigar says. "Come prepared with facts to present to them and stand your ground, without losing your cool." Become critical will only engage their ego, so it's better to base your argument with true, tangible items rather than emotional justifications.

If you're married to an Aquarius...

Spoiler alert (that you probably already know): If you cry or get emotional in front of your Aquarius partner, they won't have a clue what to do. That's why Tigar says it's better to wait until you've gotten your temper or tears under control before approaching the conversation. "They love to analyze things, so just give them the facts without being dramatic," she says. "If you're overly upset or having an outburst, they'll freeze."

If you're married to a Pisces...

Because they're an impressionable water sign, a Pisces will pick up on whatever clues, either directly or indirectly, you're sending their way. This is why it's important to manage your own emotions and be mindful of what messages you're allowing to impact your partner. "If you start firing them up, they'll get really dramatic, cry easily, or fall apart. They'll crawl into a hole and pout. Or they can be a martyr," Tigar says. Instead? If they start to overreact, soothe them and come back to the conversation later.

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