Having a Man of Honor at Your Wedding? Here's How to Determine His Key Responsibilities

Having a man of honor at your wedding is a wonderful way to acknowledge the bond you share with your male best friend. But how does this affect the wedding planning commitments and responsibilities typically handled by the maid of honor? Does your man of honor have all of the same duties?

The short answer is: sort of. It's ultimately up to the two of you. Depending on the relationship you two share and the composition of the rest of your bridal party, your man of honor may want to be very involved—or prefer to take a hands-off role. To help you two figure out just how much he should take on, here's what he needs to know about the various aspects of wedding planning typically handled by the bride's main attendant.

Wedding-Dress Shopping

If your brother is your man of honor, he may not want to join you while you shop for a wedding dress. The same goes for a male best friend. That said, he may feel comfortable joining you as you try on gowns, so ask him if he's interested—but don't be hurt if he'd rather see you in the dress on the big day. You have a whole group of 'maids and other VIP women in your life who are ready to ohh and ahhh over all of the beautiful options you try on.

Planning Details

Early on in the process, and again in the weeks leading up to your wedding day, have a conversation with your man of honor to make sure you're on the same page about how he will help out with planning and logistics. This could include everything from heavy-lifting (literally) and following up with your vendors to tracking down RSVPs and helping with errands. If he's shown an interest in helping you research vendors or brainstorming décor ideas, embrace his enthusiasm.

The Bridal Shower

Although the bridal shower is typically attended only by women, your man of honor can certainly help plan and enjoy the festivities. If he feels uncomfortable about the idea of being the only man in a room filled with women, let him bow out of this task.

The Bachelorette Party

Should your man of honor attend—or even plan—the bachelorette party? By all means, yes! It wouldn't be a proper party without your bestie in tow, and he likely knows some, if not all, of the other 'maids and friends who'll attend. If for some reason he's not that into it, plan a mini celebratory outing just for the two of you.

The Wedding Morning

Leave it up to your man of honor to decide if he'd prefer getting ready with the groomsmen or on his own. Either way, he should plan to arrive to the bridal suite well before the ceremony to share in the excitement and to take photos. He probably won't be the person tasked with fixing your veil or bustling your wedding dress, but you'll still want him there for support.

The Speech

Your man of honor should certainly prepare a speech for the reception. If you're having a co-maid of honor, both attendants can offer short toasts to the couple, or read a combined one.