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6 Couples Share What They Loved Most About Writing Their Own Vows

Let these real spouses inspire you to pen your own sentiments.

Contributing Writer
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Photography by: Brett Heidebrecht

One of the most personal, intimate, and unique parts of a couple's wedding is often the ceremony—especially if the bride and groom have chosen to write their own vows instead of exchanging a traditional version. If you and your fiancé are still trying to decide whether or not you'll write your own, hearing what other brides and grooms loved most about sharing personalized statements can help you make a decision. Here, find out what newlyweds loved most about their vows, and why they'll remember each word forever.

 

Tips for Acing Your Wedding Vows

 

That they shared similar sentiments.

Recent bride Katie has been to a number of weddings where the vows were very generic and the ceremony didn't say anything about the couple. "I wanted our ceremony to be very unique to us, so we decide to write our vows separately, but agreed on a general structure," she explains. "We started off talking about what we loved the most about the other person and then transitioned into our promises to each other. We both ended up saying that our intelligence was the thing we really loved, and it makes me so happy that we said the same thing without ever discussing it." 

 

That they were funny.

Tying the knot is a serious event, but that doesn't mean you—or your officiant—can't add a few funny lines into your vows. "Our wedding vows were a little humorous," says bride Lytania. "The close friend who married us has us over every Sunday for the Patriots game. This has been going on the entire eight years that we've been dating and engaged. He slipped in, 'You vow to love each other better or worse, in sickness and health, and if the Patriots win or lose.' It was so funny. We loved it!"

 

That they were an opportunity to share unexpected experiences with guests.

As a humble couple, Bobby and Peter rarely tell loved ones about the many experiences they've embarked on together, so many guests didn't know about the exciting adventures the grooms had taken. "Bobby wrote and shared in his vows many intimate memories and important facts about our fantastic, fun life together that all 200 people in the audience had no idea about," Peter explains. "I'm a very private and humble person and never let anyone know about the amazing life experiences we have done together, like kayaking across the Long Island Sound."

 

5 Couples Reveal What Inspired Their Own Wedding Vows

 

That they were a toss-up.

Choosing who will read their vows first can be tough, so Kerri and her new husband decided not to. "We asked our officiant (who was my younger brother) to flip a coin mid-ceremony to decide who would give their vows first," she explains. "It was so fun to share that anticipation with my husband amidst a day that can sometimes feel so planned or orchestrated. We got a ton of compliments from attendees about how funny it was. Our vows were quirky, too—I vowed to always be funnier than my husband!"

 

That they came organically.

So many couples finish writing their vows the night before—or morning of—their wedding. But for Austin, that moment of completion almost never came. "I came up with the brilliant idea that the best way to speak from the heart was to not actually write out my vows, but to outline them in my head and wing it on wedding day," he says. "That seemed like great idea until the day before the wedding. I started to think about what would happen if I couldn't find the right words up on the altar! I fancy myself an above-average public speaker, but my only experience was either business or law presentations in school. This was a whole different animal. So, the night before our wedding, I wrote down what I had been thinking about saying for months. The last minute nature of it actually ended up helping me out. I couldn't overthink it, and was forced to just write what was in my head and heart."

 

That their friends wrote the words for them.

Kpoene' and Anne were struggling to write vows that felt authentic, so they gave up on the idea of writing them and asked their friends to do the work instead. "A few days before the wedding, we got together with three couples who we felt represented what we wanted our marriage to look like, and gave each of them a theme and asked them to come up with vows for us," Kpoene' explains. "Irvin and Ann wrote about creativity, and while reading the vows they presented us with a hand-loomed scarf that they wound around us and stitched together. Johnny and Sarah spoke about honesty, and Mark and Margarita wrote a poem about fidelity and read it in Spanish."

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