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Here's How You Handle a Bridesmaid or Sibling Who Wants to Help with Everything

Because ignoring them doesn't actually work.

Desert Weding California
Photography by: Laura Gordon Photography

Excitable siblings and over-eager bridesmaids can be a real drain on your resources while you're planning your wedding. While it's wonderful to have help, dealing with someone who wants to weigh in on every decision is taxing, especially since there's not a whole lot of time to spend chatting through what you may consider to be small details. Rather than ignoring these ladies entirely, here are a few ways to address anyone who may be offering a little too much assistance in the wedding planning department.

 

How to Deal if Your Bridesmaids Don't Get Along

 

Recognize and appreciate their enthusiasm.

Nine times out of ten, this kind of excitement from a friend or family member is just waiting to be recognized. Reach out and acknowledge how grateful you are for their willingness to help you by taking some tasks off your plate. While you may not have much you feel like you can ask them to do, it might be nice for you to be able to sit down and chat through some ideas together. This person is usually reaching out because they want to be able to ease your stress level and talking it out often helps with that.

 

Don't compare them to other bridesmaids.

You selected each of your bridesmaids for different reasons and it's not helpful to compare how each woman is pitching in. You probably lean on each of the ladies in your life in very different ways, so it's good to acknowledge that.

 

Assign them specific tasks utilizing their skill set.

As the old adage goes, "If you can't beat them, join them." In this case, you can join them by taking them up on their offers to help. By giving your overly-eager bridesmaid or sibling a specific and time-consuming task, you're redirecting their energy to something they can claim as their own. While you should steer clear of assigning them anything major (i.e. designing wedding invitations or negotiating with one of your vendors), you may be able to find something they do well and use it to your advantage.

 

If your sister is a poetry fanatic, ask her to send you 8-10 passages you may be able to use for readings during the ceremony. If your best friend is a music buff, ask her if she'd put together a playlist for you to listen to while you're getting ready for the wedding. Hand out tasks that are easy for you to edit down and finalize in your own way. In doing so, you can avoid disappointment and encourage your gals to feel like they've contributed in a major and helpful way.

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