Wedding planning is a team sport. Although you'll certainly lean on your vendors and family, your husband-to-be will likely be your planning partner in crime. But every man will have a different reaction to the idea of taking on the role of groom. Here are the five most common types of grooms to expect, and how to deal with each of them.
The "Yes Dear" Groom
When you suggest a new décor idea or cake flavor, this man always responds with a "yes." He doesn't ask questions, and doesn't offer any alternative solution. At first thought, this easy-to-please groom seems like the ideal planning partner, but you need to consider the underlying reasons behind relaxed his behavior. Maybe he simply doesn't care about the details of the wedding and wants to hand you the reins. It's also possible that he's scared to voice opposing opinions out of fear that you'll get mad. Let your man know that his opinion is valued, and try to make the planning two-sided. After all, the wedding ceremony is for both of you.
As the male equivalent of a "bridezilla," this man tries to control every aspect of the wedding. He makes his opinion known, and he may have a fit when he doesn't get what he wants. This type of groom will put a damper on wedding planning and will likely cause strain in the relationship. To prevent a blowout, talk to your man as soon as he starts to get controlling. Emphasize that you want to help with preparations and split the responsibilities evenly. Be prepared to talk, listen, and make compromises to keep the peace.
The Lazy Groom
This man doesn't take on any wedding-related responsibilities. He shrugs off your requests for help, and can't keep attention when discussing the upcoming ceremony. If your groom doesn't show any interest in your wedding, you may feel hurt and upset. Calmly talk about your feelings to him, and explain why you would like assistance. It's true that many men simply aren't interested in planning a wedding. He may also feel overwhelmed by the little details of the ceremony. Assign him tasks that he's genuinely interested in, like picking the music or designing the stationery. He may feel more inclined participate if he enjoys the work.
The Traditional Groom
Unlike the lazy groom, this man actually helps with wedding planning—but only the traditional groom tasks. These include ordering groomsmen outfits, choosing a band, and arranging the honeymoon. As much as you appreciate his efforts, you could use some assistance choosing the invitation design or favor bag contents. Maintaining open communication is key in this situation. Your groom is obviously willing to help, but he might not know how. Talk about the wedding duties and decide how to split them between the two of you.
This groom obsesses about pinching pennies when planning your wedding. He'll inquire about the cost of everything, and panic at the inevitably steep price. Before you start wedding preparations, discuss your financial situation and plan a budget. Prioritize the aspects of your wedding that you'll splurge on, and decide where to save money. Sticking to a concrete financial plan will help ease your groom's mind, and working with a budget will prepare you for dealing with money in marriage.