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6 Reasons Why You Should Have Kids in Your Wedding

Honor your favorite youngsters with the role of a lifetime.

Contributing Writer
jess todd wedding seattle flowergirls
Photography by: Belathée Photography

There's something warm and endearing about having children in your wedding party. A nice complement to the adults in your wedding crew, little ones add youthful charm and energy to your special day. The best age for flower girls and ring bearers is typically between three and seven years old; if they're younger, they won't be able to take direction, and if they're in their older (eight to 15 years old), it's more appropriate for them to be junior attendants. If you're on the fence about including kids, here are a couple of convincing reasons to go for it.

 

WAYS TO KEEP FLOWER GIRLS AND RING BEARERS HAPPY

 

They'll look adorable.

Who can resist a tiny boy walking down the aisle carrying a ring pillow that looks bigger than he is? Or a little girl wearing a floral crown and a big smile as she drops rose petals to mark the bride's path? They'll get plenty of oohs and ahs from the crowd during the processional and lots of encouragement to do their thing, without a care in the world, on the dance floor.

 

 

You want to acknowledge special kids in your life.

Are you known as the fun aunt, the one who's always willing to kick a soccer ball around or play dress-up for hours? If there are kids who are especially dear to you, like relatives and children of especially close friends, it will feel as natural to invite them to play a special role on your wedding day as it is to ask your college roommates to be bridesmaids.

 

You can honor as many boys and girls as you want.

Besides flower girls, ring bearers, and junior attendants, there are other roles for youngsters to take on. Children between nine and 12 can be candle lighters, teens can be ushers or readers, and two young children may act as pages at a formal wedding, holding your train as you walk down the aisle. This is your chance to feel like a princess, a la Kate Middleton!

 

They won't steal the show from you.

Cute as they are, children in the wedding are not, and never will be, the main attraction. That would be you, the woman in white (or pink or green) whose star quality can't be diminished by anyone that day. Your loved ones have gathered to see you (oh, the groom too!) and to celebrate the start of your new life's journey. Child attendants are the icing on the (wedding) cake, not the dinner entrée.

 

You can have as many or as few as you wish.

There's no etiquette rule that demands an equal number of boys and girls. It's fine to have one ring bearer and two flower girls, or one flower girl and one junior groomsman. Do whatever works best for you.

 

It'll be an unforgettable experience for them.

Some adults remember little about their childhoods except for the day they were in a wedding party. Then they remember every detail—the walk down the aisle, taking photos out in the garden, the party dress they got to wear. You could be the person who helps a child create a memory that never fades. What power!

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About the Author

Nancy Mattia

Though Nancy has been writing about weddings for years, she admits that watching a bride walk down the aisle—even on TV—still makes her tear up. The New York-area writer's other favorite wedding moments are when the groom sees the bride for the first time, hearing the toasts, and when she sees a waiter with a tray full of hors d'oeuvres walking towards her. 

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