8 People You Don't Have to Invite to the Wedding

You don't need to add every single one of your Facebook friends to your guest list.

Contributing Writer
Photography by: O'Malley Photographers

If your guest list is twice as long as your arm and it's killing your budget, cut it! (Your list, not your arm.) Even if you're feeling obligated, guilty, torn or cheap, there comes a time during every couple's wedding planning period when it's necessary to reassess the list. Who should get the heave-no? Start with these folks.

The old friend who you never see anymore. 

Even on visits home to your parents, you never have the inclination to get together with her—and she lives around the block! That should tell you something. If the last time you two were in the same room you were both wearing trucker hats, you can safely cross her off the list without hurting her feelings. (Does she even know you got engaged?)

Your Facebook friends. 

And Twitter followers and all the people you Snapchat with. You may be social-media friendly with a few former coworkers but if you and these people aren't social (retro meaning: you get together with them in person regularly), remove 'em.

The entire team at work. 

This could get awkward if you invite some and not others but it comes down to this: Who do you eat lunch with? If you'd feel uncomfortable telling him or her that they've got kale in their teeth, it's okay to hit the delete button and floss out their names.

Your ex. 

You two are still friendly but will he be okay watching you marry another guy if (your friends think he's still sweet on you). Unless you're absolutely sure the fire in his heart doesn't even flicker for you, spare him the pain and give that seat to someone you haven't slept with.

Your girlfriend's brand-new hot and heavy crush. 

She knows you're letting other friends bring their significant others so she insists on inviting her boy toy too. But this guy? Significant? Not quite yet. Don't let the fact that you did tequila shots with him last week break your resolve.

Dad's golfing buddies. 

Parents love to invite friends to their children's weddings. But you may need to draw a line at who's a close comrade and who's merely an acquaintance unless you don't care who the stranger is munching on cocktail franks in the corner.

A couple who invited you to their wedding. 

Maybe they had a bigger budget or more room for friends who they weren't super close to but just because you watched this twosome become a onesome doesn't automatically mean you've got to reciprocate if they're lovely but, admittedly, D-list pals.


If you want your wedding to be an adults-only affair, then this cut is a no-brainer. But if a limited number of kids will be invited, like your flower girls, will other parents of the junior set feel slighted that their offspring had to stay home with Grandma? Some will be offended while others will view your wedding as date night, happy to not contend with drool and Legos. It's your wedding—set up the rules fairly and do what you want.

About the Author

Nancy Mattia

Though Nancy has been writing about weddings for years, she admits that watching a bride walk down the aisle—even on TV—still makes her tear up. The New York-area writer's other favorite wedding moments are when the groom sees the bride for the first time, hearing the toasts, and when she sees a waiter with a tray full of hors d'oeuvres walking towards her. 


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