7 Things the Mother of the Bride Should Never Say While Wedding-Dress Shopping

Even if Mom is your best friend and thrilled to help you try on wedding dresses, she may slip up and say something so hurtful or outrageous, you dissolve into tears. Or want to punch the fitting-room door. Or worse. Here are some gems no bride wants to hear.

Contributing Writer
Photography by: New Line Cinema/Courtesy Neal Peters Collection

"That dress would look perfect if you were 10 pounds thinner."

Body shaming from your own mother? That's pretty low. While Mom may try to justify her remark as wanting to be "helpful," it only serves to make you feel badly about your shape. Ignore her rude remark! You can rest assured that your bridal consultant will only suggest dresses she thinks will be flattering to your figure. 


"Isn't that dress meant for a bustier girl?"

This is the other end of the body-shaming scale: Now there's not enough of you. While certain dresses look better on curvier girls, there's nothing wrong with trying on many different styles to get an idea what looks best on you. And don't underestimate the power of alterations and sewing bra cups into a dress to create fullness on top.


"With all those buttons and loops, it will take Jason all night to get the dress off you!"

Ew, just ew. That's something your bridesmaids might say, not your mom.  


"I don't like it, and I'm paying for it."

Mom is playing the "power of the purse" card. When you agreed to let her pay for your dress, did it come with a stipulation that she had veto power? Before heading to your first salon appointment, talk to your mom about her dress budget and any preconditions on style, material, etc. If any of her "rules" bother you, the alternative is buying the dress yourself.


"You need something fancier/plainer."

Some moms forget that it's not their wedding, which means their taste shouldn't play into the whole dress equation. But don't lock yourself into a narrow field of options; try on a variety of dresses—even styles you may not have been considering—so you can make a good decision.


"$3000 for a dress you're going to wear nine hours? Are you kidding me?"

Who's handing over her Visa, you or Mom? If it's you, don't get into an argument with your mother at the salon, but you'll want to keep mum about prices from that moment on. If Mom is forking over the plastic, you shouldn't be trying on dresses outside of your agreed-upon price range.


"That dress doesn't make me cry, so keep looking."

Everyone, including Mom, knows the drill: A girl tries on dress after dress, but when she walks out in a certain gown, her mom starts to cry, thus guaranteeing that this dress is The One. Hate to burst your bubble, but that scenario isn't a guarantee. What's important is if you think you've found The One. While nice if it happens, a consensus from the crowd and fresh tears on Mom's cheeks aren't prerequisites to finding the dress of your dreams.

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About the Author

Nancy Mattia

Though Nancy has been writing about weddings for years, she admits that watching a bride walk down the aisle—even on TV—still makes her tear up. The New York-area writer's other favorite wedding moments are when the groom sees the bride for the first time, hearing the toasts, and when she sees a waiter with a tray full of hors d'oeuvres walking towards her. 


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