New This Month

Can You Un-Invite a Rude Wedding Guest?

Oh no, they didn’t. Dealing with negative, critical people is a headache any day, but it’s especially unwelcome on your wedding day. After all, you deserve to feel happy and supported. So what do you do if someone you invited to your celebration is talking smack? See what we told Dorothy, who asked via e-mail, if it’s okay to un-invite them.

Photography by: Shipra Panosian

Q: Family friends were invited to my daughter’s wedding. But they’ve been nothing but rude, criticizing everything from the bridal shower to the processional music we chose. Can we un-invite them?


A: We advise against un-inviting anyone to any party, except under the rarest of circumstances (your venue floods, say, and you have to downsize to your living room). But we feel your pain. “It’s bad form—and bad karma!—to rain on any bride’s parade,” says executive editor Eleni N. Gage. “But with Negative Nellies like these, if you un-invite them, you’re probably signing up for more insults. The best thing to do is take the high road.” The next time these “friends” insult your daughter’s plans, kindly let them know how hurt you are by their harsh words. Or just smile and say, “Really? I think my beloved daughter has made a great choice of cake/music/groom. We couldn’t be happier.” That way, they’re not getting what they want—to ruffle your feathers—and you’re not triggering more drama.