Attending Your First Mehndi Party? Here's What You Need to Know About This Pre-Wedding Event

Here's how this intimate celebration, which involves the application of henna ahead of the traditional Indian ceremony, might unfold.

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Photo: A Couple of Cameras

Indian weddings involve a series of celebrations occurring before and after the couple becomes officially married. The mehndi party is one of the most lively—and important—parties in South Asian culture; the pre-wedding event surrounds the bride with family and friends during the countdown to the big day. About to be a first-time mehndi attendee? Here are a few common traditions that might unfold during this party.

What Is a Mehndi Party?

Mehndi—or mehendi or henna—is an ancient form of body art, originating in India and across South Asia and the Middle East. A mehndi party is a pre-wedding celebration in Hindu and Sikh culture; during this event, the bride has a red-orange mehndi "stain" applied to her palms, the back of her hands, and her feet.

"The family and friends of the bride adorn her with this orange, plant-based dye to 'decorate' her as the bride," says Sonal J. Shah of Sonal J. Shah Event Consultants, LLC. "It is a very vibrant and colorful event." You can also expect Indian food, music, and entertainment—and lots of colorful decor—at this traditional fete.

The Mehndi Party's Purpose and Symbolism

There's a reason why this party occurs so close to the ceremony: Tradition says the deeper the color of the bride's mehndi, the happier the couple's marriage will be. "This is a fun belief people follow, but everyone's color comes up slightly different," says Meghna Parikh, a henna artist and the owner of Color Me Rouge.

Designs unique to each bride symbolize various blessings, luck, joy, and love, may include the couple's faces, and often incorporate the bride's partner's name hidden among the imagery. "Back in the day, the couple did not know each other well before getting married, so trying to find the name helped break the ice between them," says Parikh. "These days, it has become a fun tradition to look for the partner’s name."

Mehndi Party Timing, Hosts, and Gifts

The mehndi party is held at night in the week before the ceremony; it "kicks off the wedding festivities and prepare the bride," says Shah. The party is traditionally hosted by the bride's parents—the wedding party are invited guests, and don't hold official duties—and can be held at their home, a relative's house, or another venue.

Expect this evening event to last about three to four hours, and, since it's not a drop-in reception, make sure you arrive on time, says Shah. Don't feel obligated to bring a present: A mehndi party is not a gift-giving occasion.

Mehndi Party Guest List

Customarily, only women—but those on both sides of the aisle—attend: mothers, bridesmaids, future sisters-in-law, and other close family members and friends. However, modern mehndi parties don't always follow this guideline, says Shah. "In 2023, everyone is included and invited: bridal party, groom, groom's family, and friends," she says. "The guest list now is primarily based on budget and space restrictions in the home."

Receiving Henna at a Mehndi Party

All guests can receive henna at a mehndi party, says Shah—though, since you're not the guest of honor, keep your mehndi design request understated. "Remember that as a guest, your henna should be simple and limited to one hand only," says Shah.

You don't need to have a design in mind—the artist will come up with something for you, says Parikh—but you can ask to include any imagery you'd like. The same is true for the guys on the guest list. "Men are equally allowed to apply henna. However, most choose to keep it simple with one or two lines, and not to be as detailed as the women," says Parikh. (If you prefer not to participate, is is acceptable etiquette to politely decline, says Shah.)

How Long Henna Application Takes

For brides, an average henna design covers the forearms (up to the elbows), as well as the top of the feet (up to the ankles). "This takes about four to six hours, and the paste is left on overnight," says Parikh. "If you are a close family member or friend, you may get full hands, which will take about one hour; if you are a guest, it is a one-line design that covers a third of your hand, which takes about five minutes."

Allergy Concerns

Henna allergies are rare, says Parikh. The stain is made from the leaves of the Lawsonia inermis plant, which are dried and ground into powder. "This powder is turned into a paste using water and essential oil," she says. "If a reaction does occur, immediately wash your hands and apply something cooling, like ice or aloe vera gel."

What to Wear to a Mehndi Party

Short sleeves will make it easier for the mehndi artist to apply your design, but the only real fashion guideline for a mehndi party is to leave your earth-toned neutrals at home. The dress code is "informal, but Indian-inspired," says Shah. "Wear colorful clothing and a South Asian lengha or Indian tunic. Wear something colorful—avoid wearing all-white or all-black."

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